Simply Human

Living together with him is the best. Honestly, we have so much fun together, I couldn’t imagine what else could make me happier than living with him. We just fit.

As a kid, I remember that marriage didn’t make much sense to me. I sat in the car with my dad and I remember telling him: I don’t ever want to get married. ‘Why?’ he asked. ’There’s no meaning in this piece of paper.’

I came as an exchange student to Izmir. He studied in the same Uni and was the president of a student organization ISN there. So after we first briefly met, my first idea of him was ‘that guy on the stage from the introduction week’. That was all. Me and my Estonian roommate Ketly didn’t remember his name at first, so we just called him ‘the President’.

But when we started to talk, our conversations had no end.

He is the most liveliest, vibrant person I know. He also has the kindest heart. When in Barcelona eating in a restaurant watching through the window, we saw a homeless man sleeping in the bus station. He took some food and went outside to give it to him. ‘Maybe he was hungry. I can’t fix his problems, but maybe I can make this evening a little better for him’ he said. These moments just make my heart melt.

I didn't know him yet. But I remember seeing him on that one event, speaking with people, and thinking okay. This is the type of personality that I would marry with. If anyone, this is it. I didn’t mean that he would be the actual person. I just saw him and thought that someone like him could be someone for me. So I even called my close friend Kiran to tell him that you know, I found the personality type of my future husband. :D

But little did I know that exact same person would be my boyfriend later on.

We started to talk about marriage at some point. As my own surprise too, I was the one who actually opened that conversation. I said that I think we should get married. Soon. When we are young. We can still look good on photos! He was surprised at first. But talking more, it made sense to us. For the first time, it made sense to me, too.

We were traveling in Indonesia. I was sleeping in the car on our way from Canngu to Ubud. Or that’s what I thought. I woke up when the car stopped. We had arrived. All green. Rice fields, palm trees, papaya trees, all sorts of flowers. They served us fresh papaya juice and sat us down to this little house. I was quite confused since I expected to see more of a city-like place, I asked how many houses they have there. Made (our local host) said that 2. “But only one bamboo house. The bamboo house is only for you.”

“Did we book a bamboo house??” I asked Emrah. After all, we booked so many different accommodations, maybe I just didn’t remember?

“I guess,” he said.

Made takes us to the house. We go down the stairs and further from the little house. Until we stand in front of it. A massive, breathtaking bamboo house. Made kindly walks us through the house. And I am just thinking whattt where are we? It is so beautiful! “We are not actually in Ubud. We are 1,5 hours away in a remote area. I brought you here as a surprise!” Emrah said.

Omg what really what?

I am not saying anything, just walking with him and Made to the second floor. The house is gorgeous. High ceilings, everything we see is made out of bamboo. The view is glorious. My heart jumps.

After dropping our things, we go for a quick swim in an ice-cold pool and later take a hot shower. I stay at the shower for long. The bathroom has no roof, so you can see the sun and at night the starts above.

Emrah said that Made will prepare us a dinner and it’s a nice place to take pictures too. I agree as I love picture taking. He went out to talk with Made. I am alone. I put on my red dress. I kind of suspect that something is up. So I don’t ask any questions. Putting make-up on, my hands shake. I am so nervous. Is this the moment? I can’t get my liner line right. Shit. I keep messing it up. My hands are shaking too much.

“Maybe the house was the surprise itself. Don’t think too much. We will have great pictures at the dinner” I think to myself.

Made comes with his daughters, bringing us food decorated with flowers, to our house. Served on the most beautiful, colorful plates. They bring a lot of lanterns which hold the candles. Magic.

Emrah is opening the wine in the kitchen and almost drops it. The girls giggle. He is nervous too. After placing the plates the girls leave. We eat 2 bites of rice and he tells me some stories, but we are too nervous so I can’t even remember what he said.

I just ate something extra spicy. Ooh, it's burning! He stands up and finishes his glass of wine. Made is still with us.

I can’t stop smiling. I’m laughing from joy. The first thing I saw was the box. ‘OMG what a beautiful box!’ I said! I am just laughing, is this real life? Yes!

He slips the sparkly ring to my finger. It’s a perfect fit. How is it even possible? It is a perfect fit. And the ring is just perfect too.

Light pink stone called tourmaline in the middle, surrounded with little diamonds, is decorating my hand. What a clever solution not to have a diamond ring, but have diamonds on it nevertheless. I think it’s the most beautiful ring I’ve ever seen.

Our Engagement Story

I woke up to the bright light coming through the pink curtains of this small room we called "veranda". English meaning "the porch". The room in our deep wine-red cottage house where pink roses grow up the wooden wall.

It was meant to be an open porch for sitting and looking at the nightly sky, or drinking cold tea in the afternoon. But 'cause of my grandfathers creativity, it became an additional room. A room in which I slept in.

The house itself was small. The livingroom was also my grandpas bedroom. We had a black-and-white old-school TV in there, which was placed on top of the fireplace and showed only one channel.

We had a built-in sauna, which is common for Estonian houses. But instead of using it for its real purpose, my grandmother stored her dried herbs and plants in there. She loves the nature. And she loves walking in the forest. Every bird in the forest has it's own song to sing and she knows probably of them all.

We say that if the swallows come to nest to your house, it means good luck. We must of had it a lot, because almost every year the swallows came to build their nest above our front door. They had baby birds watching over our house door, tweaking all day for the new bird parents to bring them food. And it was amazing to see how both parents of the young chicks were working and flying all day to bring warms and little bugs to their young ones who couldn't fly yet.

My room was facing towards the East, so every morning when the sun rose, it heated up the space quickly. When the sun didn't let me sleep anymore, I opened up the wooden door and went barefoot to the grass which was still wet from the morning dew. I watched the morning sun rising, while sitting on the metal swing and singing few songs which I made up myself for welcoming the sun.

For breakfast, we had this thing called "outdoor restaurant". We moved the garden table outside, covered it with linen and placed the chairs from our small kitchen next to it. Then we brought out bowls of semolina pudding with fresh strawberries on top. I drank coffee from a very young age, with mainly consisted of 1/4 of coffee and rest of the cup I filled with milk. And my sweetest grandmother secretly fed our dog Jonny, who was always sitting under the dining table, with some goods from our breakfast table.

However, the most important place in the whole house for me was The Attic. You had to climb up from the staircase placed diagonally above the kitchen table, to get there. It was the place of hidden treasures. You could find old shopping bags and newspapers written with old letters I couldn't understand. And one corner was filled with empty bottles and jars, where me and my cousins played "a shop" or "the doctors' office". In the drawers of the writing desk you could find old Soviet Union time make-up like bright pink blushes and dark red lipsticks. And from the window, you could see the dark-blue sea with ships sailing back and forth from the port located in the other side.

I will never forget that wooden deep-red house, where bushes of bright red and pink roses are growing up on one side of the houses wall. A tiny house with our little garden filled with all kinds of berries, fruits and flowers.

Kisses,

Mariliis

Childhood Memory of our Cottage House

Home in Istanbul - Settling in to the Biggest City in Europe

I'll take you along with me to a day tour inside-out from my perspective to a colorful wedding, where the air is filled with the smell of smoke and flowers and musicians are performing with flutes and drums.

Wedding traditions are a big part of most cultures. Indian weddings are known for their unique characteristics - the colors, rituals and traditions.

People close to me know, that I always want to attend a wedding. The idea of dressing up for the occasion and being a bit more glam than usual to go and celebrate love makes me always excited. I haven't been to many weddings in my life. Therefore, when I discovered that during my travels in India I'm lucky to be invited to an Indian wedding I couldn't be happier.

First things first - the wedding outfit

I was in the city called Chennai in South-East India and were on my way to a dress shop. As I was going to the wedding which lasted for 2 days it was an amazing opportunity for me to shop for some beautiful, colorful dresses.

As we reached the store, I quickly realized I'm not in the size of an average Indian woman. When the blouses were too wide for my waist, the skirts were still not long enough for my height. Oh well, I'm only able to wear the biggest number of clothing.
Eventually, we managed to find two sets of clothing for the upcoming special days and left the store with a two bags full of colorful and sparkly clothing and happiness on my face - when else would be the time I get to wear princess-like dresses in the colors of bright pink and blue with golden ornaments?

PREPARATIONS FOR THE WEDDING: Girls Mehendi night

It's a tradition in India for the girls to have a henna, also known as mehendi party before the wedding. The Mehndi event is a colorful and fun celebration held the night before the wedding, which is traditionally celebrated by the women on the bride’s side of the family. This means a lot of fun as the girls gather around and let the professional henna artists draw fine lines which come together as rich flowery decorations on our hands and feet.

After the henna design was applied to all over both sides of our hands, we couldn't touch anything till the henna dries and processes for many hours. It was entertaining to see the male family members opening the car doors for us and helping to get our shoes on, as we didn't want to ruin our henna designs by touching anything. What would be the best excuse to ask them to take pictures of us as well.

THE WEDDING CEREMONY

I read somewhere that Hindu wedding ceremony can be explained as if it were a romantic story. The bride and the groom come to the Mandap, separately, as if unknown to each other. Then they fall in love and ask the parents' permission to get married. During the various rituals, the couple commits to remain faithful to each other. Then, the family and guests bless them and wish them a very happy life and they leave the Mandap as a newly married couple.

The wedding ceremony is colorful. Air is filled with the smell of smoke and flowers and musicians are performing with flutes and drums. The actual wedding ceremony consisted of countless rituals. Rituals with fire, with flowers and fruits, with rice and singing, with prayers.

The ceremony lasted for two days, sometimes these ceremonies can last even longer. This means not only the guests need at least 2 sets of clothing for each day, also the happy couple is changing their clothes during the day many times. If I'm not mistaken then the bride had 7 different sarees for these two days to wear.

This is what I learned - Indian weddings not only unite bride and groom but also their families. Family plays a key role in making life decisions and in many cases, the parents are picking the partner for their child for the marriage. India is a collectivist culture to the core.

The wedding took place in a temple of Lord Krishna. Hindus have many Gods and all of them have separate temples. From the entrance of the temple I got myself a framed picture of Lord Krishna sitting on the lap of his mother. They sell these little pictures and books to support their community and temple. I found this picture fascinating as the lady figure truly represents an Indian woman to me - her dark, long hair is tied back and flowers are decorating the braid. She is wearing a saree what you can see most women wearing in the city picture. And she is wearing gold, which is very common for the women to wear as everyday jewelry. Overall I really love this picture and I took it home with me.

Food - Everything surprising

Between the rituals people go inside to eat. There were long tables across the room with square pieces of banana tree leaves placed in front of the seats. Waiters walk in front of the long table with various pots, pouring different foods to your 100% natural square plate and offer the guests coffee and tea.
All the rich flavorful food they offer is completely veterinarian, as both sides of the brides and grooms families do eat only vegetarian food. It comes from their cast - they are Brahmins which as well is the “highest” of the four castes in India.

Food is eaten with hands. Okay, this is a funny one - I've struggled to eat quite many times in my life in the places where food is normally eaten with hands and one of them is India. I see people around me more skilled using their hands and all I do is try to not pour it all over myself. What comes to the hygiene, I always saw people washing their hands before and after eating. The sinks are a crucial part in any food place. No problemo there.

As the city of Chennai is extremely hot, I didn't feel really like eating. I cared much more to stand under the A/C to feel some cool air blowing to my skin. But, as I heard, the food was great.

Clothing

Clothing is brightly colored with golden decorations and ornaments. Women do mostly wear sarees - which is a nicely wrapped really long piece of cloth. The dressing goes along with plenty of golden jewelry and a bindi (a red dot worn on the center of the forehead). For footwear mostly open sandals are worn.
Men wear either classical formal shirts or Indian kurta.

It's when they tell you to wear traditional clothing and you're feeling the vibe

Thank you Chennai

There's something about the city. The high degrees and humidity of the weather in a mid-summer Chennai is something to look out for. Not only once did I feel like fainting. But it's people love their city in South-Eastern India so much, returning there even if they don't live there anymore.

Overall the event was something I've never witnessed before and I truly am grateful for being invited. It's something I'll always remember.

With all the love,

So how does one Hindu wedding in India look like?

Laughing over stories I heard, tasting the flavors of unknown dish

It’s not the person you where before. It’s the person you’ll become. The modified personality what develops through struggles, obstacles and barriers you constantly need to overcome. Giving up is not an option, to survive you need to keep going forward. Continue the journey you started — mentally and physically.

It’s about adrenaline rushing through you, gravity pulling you down while climbing up the hill, sweating in a hot bus with no clear understanding, where to get out. Feeling the sun after a rainy day.

You need to be strong, even if you don’t want to. To be brave, even if you are scared. You start to feel different.

Let me tell you an episode from my life, something what happened with me during my backpacking trip in India.

Few days I stayed in a busy city full of tall houses, where business people go to work every early morning in Mondays. But this night, it was Friday. Working hours where over, office buildings where empty.
We celebrated my friends birthday with a gathering, located on a rooftop of an apartment building. Humidity of the warm air sticking to the skin.

The sky was dark, but music reaching from far and cars driving the streets didn’t let this city sleep. The air was filled with noise and it was quiet at the same time.

I was sitting on the rough surface of the roof, laughing over stories and telling some of my own. I was amazed of the people, how they took me in so quickly. I was touched in my heart by the atmosphere. We where laughing, we where dancing in the darkness of the night. The time stopped. I felt I was alive.

In some point during your travel, something clicks in you. Some new type of understanding comes to you. Suddenly you see the world with new eyes. You’ll meet the best version of yourself. The person, doing things you didn’t think you’re capable of doing, strong enough to move the mountains. The free minded adventurer, ready to take over the world.

The one whose legs can walk for long miles without stopping. The one whose mind is free from worries. Who’s careless and happy.

Laughing over stories I heard, tasting the flavors of unknown dish,

I found in myself the one who truly can move the mountains.

The Personality of a Traveler

As I was leaving India from my one month trip and walked in to the airport of Hydreabad, I was looking quite different than I usually would. India had quite an affect on me which was clearly shown in my crazy colored-patterned clothing styles, which I got exited about during my travel.

So I walked in, wearing my greenish-blue-pink kurta and a pair of sandals from a local Indian shoe shop. My hands where still covered with henna paintings I got for the wedding I attended, decorating my hands along with bangles on my hands and wearing red sparkling bindi on my forehead.

As I had given my luggage away and got my tickets, I moved on to the passport control.

It was surprisingly quiet time at the airport. After waiting in a small queue, my turn came and I stepped in front of the passport control box. Officer with big mustaches looked me and my passport. "Hello," he said. "You are from Estonia?"

"Yes"

While looking at my henna paintings of my hands he put the stamp into my passport. "You look very Indian" he said.

As I got my passport I continued my way to the security. I noticed there was two security guys waiting and didn't look too busy at the time. I placed my backpack to the x-ray machine and stepped forward through the security area.

As I did that, one of them started a conversation with me: "Where are you going?" He asked with a friendly smile.

"Oman" I said.

"Nice! Are you working there?"

"No, I'm not working yet, I'm a student" - I answered. However probably they understood that I was studying in Oman. Oh well... I didn't care to explain more, so I just took the credit for it.

I was standing and waiting to receive my backpack when something happened. The guy looking at the screen of the luggage x-ray machine asked the other one to come. Now they where looking their screen and discussing something I didn't hear nor understand. One of them took my bag, said something to the other guy and asked me with a curious look: "Do you have a stick in your bag?"

I didn't know what to answer. What kind of stick? Why would I take it to the plane with me?

They asked me to open my bag. However what we found was something they didn't expect to find - a massive cucumber! If you think of a water bottle, it was the size of it.

I bought it intending to make a salad on previous day, but as I hadn't eaten it I simply decided to take it with me and stuffed it to my backpack.

We started to laugh with the security guys, as I explained them that I'm going to eat that later. I continued my way out of the security, on the direction of the plane, feeling all kind of mixed feelings. One great adventure was about to end, but another one was starting.

What concerns the cucumber, I ate it a day later for a snack. It' was totally worth the trouble.

Our Engagement Story

Childhood Memory of our Cottage House