I'll take you along with me to a day tour inside-out from my perspective to a colorful wedding, where the air is filled with the smell of smoke and flowers and musicians are performing with flutes and drums.
Wedding traditions are a big part of most cultures. Indian weddings are known for their unique characteristics - the colors, rituals and traditions.
People close to me know, that I always want to attend a wedding. The idea of dressing up for the occasion and being a bit more glam than usual to go and celebrate love makes me always excited. I haven't been to many weddings in my life. Therefore, when I discovered that during my travels in India I'm lucky to be invited to an Indian wedding I couldn't be happier.
First things first - the wedding outfit
I was in the city called Chennai in South-East India and were on my way to a dress shop. As I was going to the wedding which lasted for 2 days it was an amazing opportunity for me to shop for some beautiful, colorful dresses.
As we reached the store, I quickly realized I'm not in the size of an average Indian woman. When the blouses were too wide for my waist, the skirts were still not long enough for my height. Oh well, I'm only able to wear the biggest number of clothing.
Eventually, we managed to find two sets of clothing for the upcoming special days and left the store with a two bags full of colorful and sparkly clothing and happiness on my face - when else would be the time I get to wear princess-like dresses in the colors of bright pink and blue with golden ornaments?
PREPARATIONS FOR THE WEDDING: Girls Mehendi night
It's a tradition in India for the girls to have a henna, also known as mehendi party before the wedding. The Mehndi event is a colorful and fun celebration held the night before the wedding, which is traditionally celebrated by the women on the bride’s side of the family. This means a lot of fun as the girls gather around and let the professional henna artists draw fine lines which come together as rich flowery decorations on our hands and feet.
After the henna design was applied to all over both sides of our hands, we couldn't touch anything till the henna dries and processes for many hours. It was entertaining to see the male family members opening the car doors for us and helping to get our shoes on, as we didn't want to ruin our henna designs by touching anything. What would be the best excuse to ask them to take pictures of us as well.
THE WEDDING CEREMONY
I read somewhere that Hindu wedding ceremony can be explained as if it were a romantic story. The bride and the groom come to the Mandap, separately, as if unknown to each other. Then they fall in love and ask the parents' permission to get married. During the various rituals, the couple commits to remain faithful to each other. Then, the family and guests bless them and wish them a very happy life and they leave the Mandap as a newly married couple.
The wedding ceremony is colorful. Air is filled with the smell of smoke and flowers and musicians are performing with flutes and drums. The actual wedding ceremony consisted of countless rituals. Rituals with fire, with flowers and fruits, with rice and singing, with prayers.
The ceremony lasted for two days, sometimes these ceremonies can last even longer. This means not only the guests need at least 2 sets of clothing for each day, also the happy couple is changing their clothes during the day many times. If I'm not mistaken then the bride had 7 different sarees for these two days to wear.
This is what I learned - Indian weddings not only unite bride and groom but also their families. Family plays a key role in making life decisions and in many cases, the parents are picking the partner for their child for the marriage. India is a collectivist culture to the core.
The wedding took place in a temple of Lord Krishna. Hindus have many Gods and all of them have separate temples. From the entrance of the temple I got myself a framed picture of Lord Krishna sitting on the lap of his mother. They sell these little pictures and books to support their community and temple. I found this picture fascinating as the lady figure truly represents an Indian woman to me - her dark, long hair is tied back and flowers are decorating the braid. She is wearing a saree what you can see most women wearing in the city picture. And she is wearing gold, which is very common for the women to wear as everyday jewelry. Overall I really love this picture and I took it home with me.
Food - Everything surprising
Between the rituals people go inside to eat. There were long tables across the room with square pieces of banana tree leaves placed in front of the seats. Waiters walk in front of the long table with various pots, pouring different foods to your 100% natural square plate and offer the guests coffee and tea.
All the rich flavorful food they offer is completely veterinarian, as both sides of the brides and grooms families do eat only vegetarian food. It comes from their cast - they are Brahmins which as well is the “highest” of the four castes in India.
Food is eaten with hands. Okay, this is a funny one - I've struggled to eat quite many times in my life in the places where food is normally eaten with hands and one of them is India. I see people around me more skilled using their hands and all I do is try to not pour it all over myself. What comes to the hygiene, I always saw people washing their hands before and after eating. The sinks are a crucial part in any food place. No problemo there.
As the city of Chennai is extremely hot, I didn't feel really like eating. I cared much more to stand under the A/C to feel some cool air blowing to my skin. But, as I heard, the food was great.
Clothing
Clothing is brightly colored with golden decorations and ornaments. Women do mostly wear sarees - which is a nicely wrapped really long piece of cloth. The dressing goes along with plenty of golden jewelry and a bindi (a red dot worn on the center of the forehead). For footwear mostly open sandals are worn.
Men wear either classical formal shirts or Indian kurta.
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| It's when they tell you to wear traditional clothing and you're feeling the vibe |
Thank you Chennai
There's something about the city. The high degrees and humidity of the weather in a mid-summer Chennai is something to look out for. Not only once did I feel like fainting. But it's people love their city in South-Eastern India so much, returning there even if they don't live there anymore.
Overall the event was something I've never witnessed before and I truly am grateful for being invited. It's something I'll always remember.
With all the love,
During autumn time I took a decision to travel through India in upcoming summer. However, realizing my dream didn’t come easy. The first time I mentioned to my dad that I want to go to India alone, his reaction was big "No!". Il knew I need to try to convince him again.
After some time, explaining and proofing that I’m an independent and reasonable young person I finally got positive answer from him.
After months of saving I had enough money to book my tickets to India and everything else regarding the stay. As my best friend lives there I went to visit him firstly and after we traveled together trough South-India in 3 weeks.
I got to go to an Indian wedding, stayed with my friends aunts, uncles and grandmothers in their homes. I even went to the beauty salon with the bride before her marriage what turned out to be a day full of waiting and reading beauty magazines, of course she decided to get every procedure the salon offers.
20 things I learned in a month roaming around in India
1. Drink masala and ginger tea
It’s a spicy tea, served with milk. Delicious! You can buy it from any corner. Only costs 10 rupees and tastes amazing! (70 Indian rupees= 1€.)
2. Eat what makes you comfortable
As spending time in families they where always nice to me, offering all kinds of food in crazy amounts. But it was very difficult for me to eat much in such heat. As it can be considered as rude not to have the food the host offers you, I was struggling with it for a while. But I understood, it’s okay to say no to food, if you don’t feel like eating. Health comes first and they will understand.
3. Indians can be really shy and not so loud as I expected
4. It’s okay not to feel clean all the time
I know, I know… I experienced in India lot of hot humid weather and even after taking a shower I wanted to shower again. The humidity sticks to the skin and makes me feel not clean at all. I understood, there is no point of changing clothes 5 times a day and take a shower every 10 minutes. Just keep a pack of fresh wipes in hand and you will be fine.
5. Don’t analyse too much about what’s inside your food
Like one friend told me there, I can’t try to understand every food combination. If it looks eatable, comes from a clean plate and tastes good, then it’s good. Don’t worry too much. Indians put some crazy ingredients together, but the result is heavenly mind blowing!
6. Wear together as much colors and patterns as you want, and more
I promise, you will still not stand out from the crowd with your clothing, even if you wear together all the colors of a rainbow. India is a country of unexpected patterns and color combinations and trust me — it works! Honestly, it looks gorgeous! Every day can be a festival and there is no such thing as too many colors.
7. Indians are helpful
8. Indian babies love to play with my hair
As the children there are always in the middle of attention (because of their cuteness), then it might happen that you play with somebody's kid. That’s what happened with me in a train, when a beautiful child just couldn’t get enough of my long light-brown hair.
9. Wear some fresh flowers in your hair
You can buy them in any corner and all the locals Indian ladies decorate their hair with nice smelling flowers.
10. Wear leggings, baggy,- or what ever pants under a skirt, dress or kurta
Nothing happens if you don’t, I just feel more comfortable not showing more than most local ladies do.
11. There are lots and lots of temples to see and all of them have their own specialty
12. It’s not allowed to smoke in public
13. Christian church, Islamic mosque and a Hindu temple are peaceful neighbors in India
14. Driving in Indian traffic is a survival every day
Be VERY careful.
15. Sweet and light food is difficult to find for breakfast in local restaurants
Cereal and fruit eater as I am, I faced some difficulties at the breakfast table.
16 “Aama” means yes in Tamil language
17. There is never enough time to see everything
Trying to see everything at once in a short period of time will make you tired and takes the fun out of it. Better take your time seeing and going around.
18. Paneer butter masala is the best thing I ever ate
19. It’s the most easiest place to be or try to be a vegetarian
You don’t even realize that it’s pure vegetarian food, because you are mind blown with every flavor.
20. Bollywood songs are super catchy
Before you notice, you are dancing along.
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This is my personal view on India and what I learned. By all means I don't claim that this is the universal truth for everybody.
